Posted in advice, Family, women

Embracing The Chaos

Over the past several months, I’ve been mentally preparing for having two children.  I’ve seen the havoc that has descended upon a few of my friends’ households as they’ve welcomed a second child into their lives.  Those first few months are crazy-town! 


This is especially true when the existing child is still a toddler and still needs so much from their parents.  Newborn Land has it’s own sleep-deprived kind of crazy. Adding to that a toddler adjusting to HUGE changes and likely getting thrown off of their routine helps to propel the whole situation into straight up chaos.  Do you know what’s difficult for perfectionist-type personalities such as mine?  Chaos.

So, I’ve been in total preparation mode the last few days as the reality that my baby girl will be here within a few short weeks has been setting in.  Action alleviates anxiety right?  So, I’ve been getting all of her clothes washed and put away.  I’ve prepared the changing table and bassinet.  I’m constantly imagining every “what if” scenario my brain can muster – which is way too many, and part of why I’ve been up since 3:30 this morning. I’m trying to get everything in my home as prepared and “easy to access” as possible.  As I’ve been busying myself with these things, it’s occurred to me that maybe I’m overthinking all of this.  Many people have survived having two children, or more under age 3.  It’s going to be OK.

I will continue prepping my home and brain for the arrival of our second child.  However, I’m also learning to embrace the chaos in various situations.  Through working on my perfectionistic self and tendencies, I’ve learned that you can’t control everything and it’s exhausting to feel like you should.  So, I keep reminding myself to give myself space and grace to get through the things.  I know that this next season will be difficult, but it will also be magical.  My house will be a mess much of the time and my toddler is probably going to have some issues adjusting.  But, if I get all caught up in my need to control instead of just embracing what is, I’m going to miss all of the little magical moments that will also happen during this time.  I can get over not having a 100% clean home.  I can’t get over missing out on important moments, milestones, and the beauty of watching my children grow.

As I move through this time of embracing the chaos, I will remind myself of these three things:

1. I am strong, adaptable, and resilient

I have been through chaotic times before and made it through just fine.  I am actually quite good at adapting to a new situation and finding ways to make whatever kind of situation I end up in comfortable.  So, I know I can do hard things and make it through to the other side.  Everything is able to be figured out.  Every situation can be navigated.  If people can survive huge life traumas, I can survive this transition time in our lives.

2. Keep moving forward

As I’m navigating figuring out the new dynamics of my family life, I will remember to keep moving forward.

3. Be grateful

I will choose to see the blessings I have. I will take notice of the little things that I’m most grateful for beyond the obvious (like coffee!). I am blessed to have the family, health, love, support and comfort I have.

Bring it on chaos! I’m ready for you.

Posted in advice, Family, Goals, Leadership

The Power of Personal Development

When I learned I was becoming a mom for the first time, I was fully prepared to lose myself to motherhood.  Motherhood was something I always aspired to.  That was a major life goal of mine.  I was under the assumption that my full identity would be wrapped up in who I was as a parent.  I would put all my dreams and goals on hold until my children were old enough to start being self-sufficient and then I’d figure out who I was as a person.  As time went on, I was feeling stuck.  I loved being a mother and wouldn’t trade it for anything.  However, I wasn’t as fulfilled as I thought I would be.  I went complete 50’s housewife there for a moment and boy am I glad we live in a day and age where that’s optional and not necessarily expected.  I was still working part-time from home but felt I needed to handle all of the things because my husband obviously wasn’t capable.  [Insert facepalm] It’s crazy what kinds of stories we make up about our situation, isn’t it? Continue reading “The Power of Personal Development”

Posted in Family

Pregnancy After Miscarriage: All The Feels

I’ve taken a little hiatus over the past 4 months.  I’m back now and hitting you hard with the heavy stuff.  Thank you all for your patience and the space and grace to allow me to focus on other things for a while.

As many of you know, I had a miscarriage at the end of 2018.  It was very difficult for me, as it is for any woman.  I had never known how isolating it could be until I experienced it myself.  Even with knowing so many others who went through it and having a caring husband who also felt pain around it, it is still a very lonely experience.  However, I shared my story and hopefully helped ease some of the heartache that another woman has had involving a miscarriage.  I was able to work through it and not let it stop me from trying again. Continue reading “Pregnancy After Miscarriage: All The Feels”

Posted in advice, Family, Goals, self worth

5 Tips To Get Out Of A Rut

It can be easy to get stuck in a rut as a parent.  Especially in early parenting when you feel like you’re drowning in toddler tantrums and stickiness EVERYWHERE.  Seriously, why are they always so sticky?  Anyways, I’ve found myself in a rut recently.  I’m not inspired in my job.  I have no motivation to pursue my goals and I feel like I’m just treading water.  My child is so wonderful and I love him to pieces, but he’s also in a very needy stage and testing boundaries.  The constant correcting and boundary establishment feels entirely draining.  It’s all normal and appropriate to his development, but damn it’s exhausting! Continue reading “5 Tips To Get Out Of A Rut”

Posted in advice, Family, Goals, Momentum

5 Things To Do When Life Is Overwhelming

In an age of information, personal growth, and an overwhelming amount of people telling you what you should and shouldn’t be doing, it’s easy to get overwhelmed.  Everyone has their opinions and most people are not afraid to voice them to you or anyone else.  Generally, they are unconcerned or just careless about who their opinions affect.  They don’t take into consideration the situations of others when making blanket statements such as “I think everyone should use organic, eco-friendly diapers.  It’s just irresponsible to use anything else.”  Meanwhile, the widowed mother of two who has to lean on state assistance to get by, starts to feel like crap because though she would love to save the environment, she simply can’t afford those diapers that are twice the cost of regular ones. Continue reading “5 Things To Do When Life Is Overwhelming”

Posted in advice, Family, Goals, self worth

Accept The Compliment

As a veterinary technician, I work in a field that is heavily dominated by women.  While there are a fair amount of fellas around and more are venturing our way every day, it is still mostly women.  I think this is really great.  Women have the amazing ability to be strong and fierce, while also somehow being loving and caring.  In the clinic that I work in, the owner is a male veterinary surgeon.  Our other surgeon on staff is a powerful and accomplished female, though she’d be damned if she’d let you recognize her for that.  The rest of the staff with the exception of 1 man are all female technicians or assistants.  Every single person that works in our clinic is great at what they do.  We are a cohesive unit, a well-oiled machine.  We get the job done and we do it well every single day.  Our patients feel the love and confidence in our abilities. We get compliments regularly from our peers and clients about our exceptional care and service. We are over here just doing the dang thing! Continue reading “Accept The Compliment”

Posted in advice, Family, Goals, Momentum, self worth

5 Tips To Help You Let Things Go

Every single one of us have things that we have a hard time letting go.  We have heartbreaks, betrayal, insecurities, and fears.  Sometimes we can let things roll off our back.  Other times, we have a harder time letting things go, especially when you had it planned all out in your head and it didn’t go that way at all.  We get resentful when our spouse isn’t helping around the house or seems blind to the clutter in the living room.  We feel hurt when our friends go out and forget to invite us.  We have guilt when we are asked to do something and have to refuse because we are too tired, double-booked ourselves, or we feel we’ve disappointed someone. Continue reading “5 Tips To Help You Let Things Go”